Divorce & Blended Fams

Divorce and combining two families is something that could be very difficult for one to go through. However, I want to talk about how there are blessings and miracles through some of these hardships. I want to share a story from one of my best friends. She comes from a combined family, and the way she talks about her family you never would’ve known they were anything but blood. I know that everything happens for a reason. We may not know the reasoning behind everything, but we can find joy in our trials.

My friend’s mom passed away when she was seven years old. Her mom left behind my friend and her two younger brothers. Her father shortly after we married a woman who had three kids and had gone through a divorce. What once was two families of five, now became one family of eight. This was not something that was easy for my friend. She had to learn how to love her new siblings. The first few years were very hard, but her family was able to build their relationships upon understanding and increased love. She stated, “I now have a love for my family I never thought I would feel before.” They don’t ever use the words stepsiblings or step mom and dad because they all love each other the same.

Love absolutely comes when you learn to sacrifice and serve others. My friend, growing up with two brothers, never thought she would have a sister… even though she wanted one so bad. She talked to me about how she would pray on her knees every night to Heavenly Father to bless her with a sister. Her sister came in the most unexpected way possible. Her sister came through her mom having to pass away and her stepmom having to go through a divorce in order to find her dad. Now, those two things are hard and I don’t wish them up on my own worst enemy. However, miracles have come through those two things for my friend. She knows that she is happy and that the trials she’s had to go through have helped shape her into the woman she is today. She knows that without those trials she may have never experienced some of the sweetest joys life has to offer. I admire her example!

The story gives me much hope for the future. I understand that in order to build healthy strong relationships, we have to be willing to give them a chance. It could be really easy to wallow in our own self-pity and hardships. But, why would we want to? Why would we want to spend our lives either hating ourselves, hating others, sad at the circumstances we have to experience, etc.… when there is something to be said about these things. Elder L. Tom Perry said, “In a world of turmoil and uncertainty, it is more important than ever to make our families the center of our lives and the top of our priorities. Families lie at the center of our Heavenly Father’s plan.

We need to make our homes a place of refuge from the storm, which is increasing in intensity all about us. Even if the smallest openings are left unattended, negative influences can penetrate the very walls of our homes.” Families are central to our Heavenly Fathers plan. Satan knows how to get through to us. He wants to destroy all families. We know that we can find the most abundant amount of joy within the family. It is no surprise that Satan will do everything in his power to sneak in and give us reasons to doubt ourselves and others. If we learn to embrace this journey called life and know that there are going to be ups and downs…some of which we may not ever understand, we will be much better off. Why? Because there is power in faith and hope! Alma 32: 21 “And now as I said concerning faith—faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore, if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true.